Is My Marriage Dead?
Some marriages are dead. Some just look that way. Two evenings to find out which one you're in. And, your partner doesn't need to read a word of it.
You're not bad at communicating. You're stuck in a pattern.
One of you moves toward the problem to feel safe. Bring it up, say it again, don't let it drop. The other moves away to feel safe. Shut it down, say I'm fine, go find something to do in the garage.
Nobody is doing it wrong.
Both of these are completely reasonable from the inside. That's what makes it so hard to climb out of. Your reaching feels like love from where you're sitting and like pressure from where they're sitting, so every honest try pulls the knot tighter.
What's Inside
Three signs it's a rough patch, and three signs it's real trouble. Most people read their own backwards.
The Autopsy Questions™, including the one I ask in my office that makes everybody squirm
Your Internal Movie™, and why "can we talk?" means something completely different in their head than it does in yours
The runner and the chaser, and how to step out of it without giving up on them
Four reasons a partner goes quiet, and only one of them is "they don't care"
Twenty seconds that decide where a fight goes, and the exact words to say when you feel yourself flooding
Stay, go, or the Third Option™, plus a thirty day plan you can start this week
The four things real repair needs, so you can tell a real apology from one that just wants the subject dropped
Prefer pen and paper? Print any worksheet pages you want to write on by hand.
Hi, I'm Staci...
I'm a relationship mentor, and I've been a divorce mediator for thirteen years. Which means I've done a lot of sitting with people on the worst day of their marriage, and a fair amount of sitting with people on the day they found out it wasn't over after all.
I wrote this book because of what I kept watching with my clients. People burying a relationship that was still breathing. People waiting years beside one that had ended a long time ago. Both of those are avoidable, and both of them start the same way, with a guess.
So I won't promise to save your relationship. Nobody can, and anyone who says otherwise is selling you something. Saving one takes two people. Getting clear takes one, and that part I can help with.
None of this is theory for me. My husband Tom and I have had to learn every one of these skills ourselves, mostly the hard way, and we talk about that every week on our podcast, Love Shack Live.
What you get:
Is My Marriage Dead?, a 148 page PDF, downloadable the moment you buy
Seven worksheets built into the book, with about forty pages you write on
A printable worksheet pack, and a fillable one you can type into and save
Yours to keep, and to download again any time
